Alone time at the Bad

Friday was a new experience for me. I went somewhere by myself! While I do go places by myself these days, it is usually to go grocery shopping, on an errand or to pick up or return from dropping off kids. This day all of the kids were being taken care of by Paul and I truly did not have any responsibilities other than to be alone with myself at the Thermal Baths. I had even taken care of supper by throwing a chicken in the crock pot on low. So there I was, ahhhh.

So now what? what does a person so used to running in fifth gear do with herself. Fortunately the baths take care of that by proving a relaxing warm environment to think, people watch and contemplate the future. This day I had a plan and that was to read : "How to Hear from God" by Joyce Meyer, the book my small group is reading at the moment. Life for us has been so fast and crazy these past three plus years that best we try, to hear God has been tough. So this day I was going to be quiet and open and read what God, through this lady, might have to say.

After an hour of swimming and soaking and then a nice lunch plate special, I settled into my reading for the next three hours or so, occasionally dosing off or listening to the birds, train or what ever language that caught my ear as my mind relaxed and wandered; and I must say that the book is interesting, somewhat thought provoking and good to ponder through. It is a positive read, which is something I have needed.

One of the biggest things I came away with from this time alone is how do I discern God's voice and leading from all of the other voices running around in my head? This book pointed me in a good direction without telling me what to do (thank goodness), and for me I discovered: God will not rush the answer and if it is from God, than it will be the same answer over a period of time, perhaps hours, days or weeks and longer.

I also, came away with the feeling and an answer that I do not need to push at life so hard. I have been trying to do and to be and to push in all directions to get "it" all at once, so that I am exhausted and running on fumes. My mind has a image of me in a paper bag hitting and batting at the sides, frustrated that, while I know the sides are just paper and should be able to be broken through, they seem to flap , crinkle and reverberate harsh sounds each time I swat at them. So, this day of pulling back, let me see that pushing harder as things and life get tougher, more hectic, more demanding may actually be making them tougher, more hectic and more demanding. If I relax and concentrate on hearing from God and let my life flow towards the most imported things He has for me to hear and do than the result for me is: the paper bag feeling melts away and I can rip much the sides more easily instead of punch then out.

In closing, ( a month and a half later, 24.11) this day has lingered with me and continues to give me strength. I am looking forward to my next Spa Day!